Now we have all known commitmentphobes. Usually men, usually the great-looking men with flashing smiles who smell great and say all the right things. But we are all commitmentphobes of one sort or another.
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Many years ago I had the most wonderful old salty client. His name was Tom and he was a grizzly old Irish guy from Southie. He used to swear that a drop of the creature (a bit of imbibing) was the cure for every ill.
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Recently I had a difficult experience with a client. It took me a while to realize that all her protests were attempts to drown out her inner voice. She had blocked her ability to heal.
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I began my Sudoku journey ... easy, then on to medium, then on to tricky, then on to challenging, etc. Now I have developed a habitual rhythm to solving them and actually find them very relaxing and stress-reducing. My point here is that practice really does make perfect, and not just with mindful time wasters. It also is true with your body.
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What I find myself missing is the silence and the time outs that were an inherent part of my earlier life; my life before cell phones, e-mails, texts, twitters, and the general oppressive and compulsive nature of technology. After I came back from a vacation, I found myself not answering my cell phone, not returning messages, not turning on my computer and generally craving being outdoors and unplugged. And an interesting thing happened.
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Loneliness affects people's health. Don't doubt it for a minute. Up until this generation, older people were always kept at home where there was a sense of belonging. Where they were surrounded by their favorite things, ate the healthiest of foods, and were supported daily with love and devotion. And now?
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I want to give you an interesting truth here. All of us, and I mean ALL of us as women are unique in our bodies. And at the same time, none of us, and I mean NONE of us are happy with our body in its natural state. This has developed into the beauty biz. An entire industry to give us what we are missing or what we think we are missing.
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I think half of our problems would resolve and half of our illness would disappear if we all had someone to talk to...
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We try to do healthy things, not really knowing if they make a difference or not to our longevity. We don't really think about our quality of life, because today our quality is pretty good. I've been especially thinking about this lately because I don't have a husband, or any children. Who could I rely on if my quality of life declined?
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So last night it was a gorgeous night for sleeping, meaning all the windows are open and the breeze was like out of a dream. And then the trucks began. Monday morning at 4:30 AM and it should be illegal! But the truth is that not only is my peaceful rest disturbed on most mornings, the idea of peaceful rest doesn't really even exist anymore.
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Just as we absorb information and develop coping mechanisms during our formative years, we also are developing a pattern for our future health. Chronic issues such as headaches, heart palpitations, tinnitus, allergies and blood pressure can all be remnants of your childhood adaptations.
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Separating ourselves from community takes away a huge source of energy and metabolism for our lives. We need to look at that when we are discussing depression, suicide, chronic illness and mental illness. We need to look at that when we are facing cancer. We just need to look at that…
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